Random things that came up throughout our first day at Cubs' camp...
JDot didn’t realize that Aaron Miles was white. He remembered after I reminded him that we had this identical conversation last year when the Cubs played the Cardinals. It’s like being at Spring Training with the guy from “Memento.”
Nothing says “wholesome family entertainment” like watching two eight year olds play catch. Except when one misses a ball and shouts to the other “why the fuck did you throw it so hard?” Ahh, Americana.
Jim Hendry walks through this place like a chubby Hugh Hefner at a Playboy party. Only the girls he charms are all older than 135. He’s got a way with the bluehairs.
My favorite exchange from Day One:
Fan: “Hi Mr. Hendry. You’ve been doing a great job. How are you?”
Hendry: “Good. Nice to meet you.”
Fan (not skipping a beat): “So why the hell did you trade DeRosa?”
Hendry: “I liked your first question better.”
JP’s going to write more about this later, but I’m convinced that there is no bigger scum in this world than the mid-40s guys who show up here with bagfuls of memorabilia for players to sign for their card shop/Ebay Store. When we were ten years old and collected baseball cards, why did no one tell us these guys were losers?
I’m sure that all the countries of Asia are thrilled to have representatives in Major League Baseball, especially when I heard at least 4 different management people discuss “how good them Orientals are.”
My second favorite exchange from Day One:
JP: “Who’s that?”
Me: “It’s the strength coach.”
JP: “For a strength coach, he doesn’t look very strong. I could take him.”
Lunch=Hooters. Dinner=Tilted Kilt. We certainly fulfilled our “Restaurants/Bars masquerading as Strip Clubs, Complete with Creepy and Sad Old Guys” quotient for the week.
I’m 95% sure that there is a channel here that just plays “Fresh Prince” episodes on a continuous loop all day. It’s a wonderful, wonderful channel.
The “When Taken Out of Context, This Sounds Much Worse Than it Was” quote of the day:
“When you do 19 guys in a room with only two beds, it’s only like $5 each.”
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
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Are we sure that JDot actually has available brain cells left to store information? At this point, I would imagine there is only a finite number available, so with each new nugget of info, some other tidbit is erased. Judging from the pictures, I would imagine that mental images from the Twisted Kilt have booted out any memory of Miles' skin color, along with the skin color of every other Cubs player.
ReplyDeleteWere you three the "Creepy and Sad Old Guys"?