What Has Two Thumbs and the Ability to Kill a Winning Streak? This Guy.

That's right ladies and gents, the nightmare is back! Against the advice of friends, family, and the occasional angry commenter, I have decided to lift my self-imposed ban and once again return to Wrigley Field.

Please hide the women and children, wrap Aramis in bubble tape, and PLEASE, for the love of God, don't bet on the Cubs this afternoon. Nothing good can or will happen today.

As my four readers are well aware, I am now riding a personal best 10 game losing streak dating back to the beginning of last year. Ten times, I have stepped inside the historic ballpark known as the Friendly Confines and 10 times the Cubs have lost...in a row.

Then why am I going back, you ask? Well, for two reasons.

1) I have been given free tickets to a suite where I will be able to enjoy copious amounts of free beer.

2) Actually, it's just the one reason.

So wave bye-bye to the four-game winning streak; say too-ta-loo to the return of D-Lee's power stroke; and wish the juiced-up Theriot happy trails.

It all comes crashing back to Earth right around 1:20 pm CST today.

My condolences.

Go Cubs.

P.S. In my pre-defense, they are going up against the reigning Cy Young winner, Tim Lincecum, today, so the blame can't all be on my shoulders, right? Right? Bueller?

UPDATE: Pre-defense Part II:

This is the lineup that Lou is trotting out there today. Wow. Murder's Row. The loss will soooo not be my fault.

J. Gathright cf	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	.111
A. Miles ss	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	.190
K. Fukudome rf	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	.312
D. Lee 1b	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	.207
M. Hoffpauir lf	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	.324
M. Fontenot 3b	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	.266
B. Scales 2b	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	.000
K. Hill c	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	.323
S. Marshall p

This Is Getting Ridiculous.

0-9.

That's the Cubs record with me in the stands dating back to the start of the 2008 season. Seriously.

ZERO WINS.

They haven't won in OVER A YEAR with me in attendance. I don't know why this is continues to happen. I have not taunted the baseball gods. I avoid cracks. I walk around ladders. I don't break mirrors. I haven't crossed paths with any black cats. I have not looked at a new moon over my left shoulder nor have I sung before breakfast (thanks Google). And yet...the Cubs continue to lose. It's infuriating. With that in mind, I have some good news and some bad news.

First the bad news. I am going today. Sorry.

Good news? If they lose today, I will not go anymore. I promise (not really).

Go Cubs.