Guest Post: "Manager" Dusty Baker

Greetings Cubs Fans!

It's your old pal Dusty. I was just sitting in my office today, bumming about my Reds being eliminated from the postseason again, when Aaron Harang stopped by. Dudes, talk about a Debbie Downer. He kept blabbing on and on about how I basically destroyed his career and how it was my fault that all the Reds pitchers were having arm troubles (blah blah blah) and, well, I started to drift off.

I mean, how many times can I hear that same sob story? Am I right? Anyway, I was reminiscing my career and I started to think about the good ole days when I was back on the North Side. We had some fun, didn't we? We laughed. We cried. Well, mostly you cried.

Dudes, I'm kidding!

Anyway, so I was sitting here thinking about you guys and I realized that you have got to be FREAKED OUT about the losing streak. If I remember correctly, you guys aren't too keen on losing streaks up there.

Hah! I'm a riot, aren't I?

So I thought to myself, "Hey Dusty, why not send your old pals a pick-me-up. Give them something to feel good about this weekend, other than joy of playing my Reds."

So here it is. My gift to you, Cubs fans. Enjoy!

Dusty's Top 5 Things Worse Than a Five Game Losing Streak

5. Kyle Orton is Your Team's Starting QB.

4. Carlos Quentin Just Went 187 On Your Fantasy Team.

3. You left your bag in plain view of Tatum Bell.

2. You chose to attend Wheaton College for the parties.

1. You're Jay Mariotti.

See, don't you feel better? That's what I thought. No need to thank me.

Go Cubs...er I mean...Reds! Go Reds!