Bronx or Bust! Part 2

With today's game seemingly out of reach (currently 11-0 in the 6th), I thought now would be the perfect time to continue our countdown of the Cubs players that most deserve a spot in the All-Star Game.

NOTE: With Micah no longer with the club and the arrival of the two-headed monster, I felt that the list needed revising.

#22 a) Mathew Murton 19 | OF
Pros: HE RIDES A UNICORN FOR GOD'S SAKE! You need more than that? Tough crowd. Ok, let’s go with his “brick-sized” thighs.
Cons: Off the top of my head…I’d have to go with the fact that he has no power and very little glove and he plays a position that requires you to have power and a glove. Other than that he’s great.
In or Out? OUT. Maybe, if they ever have an ASG just for red heads, he would…ah, who am I kidding, he wouldn’t even make that team.

#22 b) Eric Patterson 4 | OF
Pros: He is, in fact, left-handed. Can’t argue with that one.
Cons: He’s only known for two things. Speed and Defense. That being said, he frequently muffs the ball in left and then 3-hops the cutoff man. But man can he run!
In or Out? Out. He’s not even as good as his brother, which is sad on so many levels.

19-16 The “Fontenot is Still in the Majors?” Division

#19 Michael Eugene Fontenot 17 | 2B
Pros: Comic Relief? Not only is he “fit in Lee’s pocket” tiny, he also does that adorable thing where he pretends to get hit into the ground by Zambrano. That’s got to be worth something, right?
Cons: He has no other discernible talents. Seriously. Try to think of one. I’ll wait.
In or Out? Out. That is until they start honoring guys who strikeout with the bases loaded repeatedly. When that day comes, he’ll be on my ballot.

#18 a) Neal Cotts 44 | P
Pros: He’s single…ladies.
Cons: He can’t get anyone out. Ever.
In or Out? Of the ASG or the 40-man roster?

#18 b) Scott Eyre 47 | P
Pros: He now holds the Cubs record for consecutive scoreless appearances and also leads the majors with 93 holds over a four-year span while allowing the fewest number of inherited runners to score. Impressive.
Cons: Since the scoreless streak was broken, he has basically been Neal Cotts only fatter and more married. Less Impressive.
In or Out? Out. The ASG people have very strict rules regarding players who lack a chin.

#16 Jon Lieber 32 | P
Pros: Versatile veteran can be used as a starter, long man or late inning reliever.
Cons: He sucks at all of those jobs.

Go Cubs.